There is just not enough time in a day.....

for me to share everything I want to and study. I have a few more days of face in the book studying and then I am out for the summer and I can really start sharing again. Being a nursing student and trying to start a blog is a difficult thing (and probably bad timing on my part lol) but I am glad you guys are hanging in there with me. I promise after next Tuesday blogs will start popping up left and right! Until then, I will be looking like this.....

Say a little prayer for my sanity, and my blood sugars!

Famous Diabetic Fridays

I am sorry I missed last week! I have been super busy with finishing this semester of nursing school.

This week is a woman close to my heart. She is beautiful and like be diagnosed with diabetes later in life!

Introducing the fabulous Mary Tyler Moore.

I think this picture is adorable!

Now in her 70s, actress Mary Tyler Moore has always used her fame to help raise funds and awareness for diabetes. Best known for her roles in The Mary Tyler Moore Show and The Dick Van Dyke Show, she was diagnosed at age 33 with type 1 diabetes. Since then, she's become the international chairwoman of the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation. In early 2009, Moore released a new book called Growing Up Again, which shares her story of life with diabetes.

Taking a new direction.

So I did not realize that when I said I was going to blog about my life with diabetes that I was not going to have a lot to talk about... There fore I decided to blog about My Life with Diabetes... Meaning I am going to blog about my life, and bring in diabetes when it needs to come in because I do have a life. It may have a lot to do with diabetes but it is not ALL about diabetes. I want people to know that living with diabetes does not mean that your whole life has to revolve around it (even though most days it does). Some days, other than checking my blood sugar and giving myself insulin, are normal days when I don't think about it much. I want people to know the realness of diabetes and not just the bad things about it. I hope this all makes sense.

I want to make my mark in the diabetic community by living with diabetes, not just talking about the crap that comes with it! Hope you will all still follow the blog!!!

Famous Diabetic Fridays.

Welp friends, it is that time again. Today Famous Diabetic Friday presents someone I would listen to all day!!! This one I was shocked to find out was a diabetic.

Elliott Yamin may be best known for his singing voice, which won him third place in American Idol's fifth season, but he's also making news as a diabetes advocate. Yamin was diagnosed at age 16, after his mother (who has type 2 diabetes) recognized his lethargy, extreme thirst, and joint pains as warning signs of high blood sugar.

But Yamin wasn’t always so comfortable with his diagnosis. "I got really rebellious. I didn't want to take my insulin and I didn't want to believe I actually had diabetes," he told Diabetes Health in 2008. "I was pissed. I thought the future was grim and I wouldn't be able to do the things I always wanted to do." Perhaps Yamin’s most idol-worthy quality is his ability to surmount these fears: He never let his condition get in the way of his star-studded dreams. In fact, he has spoken candidly to fans about diabetes, and even opened up about it to Idol judges during his first performance.

One of those days.

Today has been one of those days... high blood sugar, give insulin, check again, still high, give more insulin, worry about crashing so wait to give next bolus, constant pump alarms, more blood sugar checks, still high and more insulin, you would think I have been eating nothing but sugar all day. wrong.

 I may not have been eating great today but its not like I am not giving myself insulin...

It makes me tired. I am so annoyed when I have days like this because you can't really relax. I am trying to get up and move around but with the amount of insulin I have floating around in my body I worry a crash will happen any minute.

I know I said yesterday that I was going to try and stop complaining but I knew myself better than to say I would never complain about diabetes again. It is always when i try to do better with my sugars I have that day that it wants to freak out and be crazy.

Hopefully I can get it sorted out by bed time.. Nothing worse than having to get up at the but crack of dawn after being up all night with high or low blood sugars.

This probably won't help.

What am I complaining about?

Let me start this by saying diabetes sucks. It is hard. It hurts. There are numerous needles and finger sticks. Diet planning and counting carbs. It is a constant struggle between high and low blood sugar and something that is constantly thought about... but today I got to experience something different.

Today was stoma day in class where we learned what a stoma/ostomy bag was and why people need them. In case you have no idea what I am talking about a stoma is is an opening, either natural or surgically created, which connects a portion of the body cavity to the outside environment (like a part of the intestines to the outside of the body). An ostomy bag collects waste that is output from a stoma. The ostomy allows the stoma to drain into a sealed collection pouch, while protecting the surrounding skin from contamination.

So now that you know what I am talking about we had the option to try one out and wear it for the day. I decided to volunteer thinking I already where an insulin pump all the time, how different could this be. I was wrong. Not only did I wear the pouching system, my instructor filled the bag with re-fried beans (to simulate fecal matter) and give me the full effect of what that would feel like. 

this is what it looked like

Wearing an insulin pump is NOTHING compared to wearing an ostomy bag. Yes it is annoying wearing something all the time but in reality I can take the pump off any time, switch to shots and no one would every have to know I was a diabetic. It is not the case with someone who needs an ostomy bag. You cannot just take this off and switch to something else whenever you feel like it. This is something that is on you all the time and is something you always have to worry about. I cannot imagine having something like this. I understand now that when I get upset about wearing something the size of a pager I need to shut up. There are bigger things to worry about and I am lucky that I only have diabetes.

I don't have cancer, I don't have HIV, I don't have something that could kill me if I manage it correctly. That is a blessing, not a curse. Today's lecture showed me that I need to be thankful for what I have. Does this mean I am not going to complain about diabetes.. NO, but it does give me the perspective that things could be much worse. To those people to wear any kind of ostomy, You are stronger than I could ever be and I cannot imagine what you go through. 

I also cannot imagine changing this every 5 to 7 days. I had mine on for about 6 hours and was almost in tears taking it off because unlike a pump site (which hurts, but feels like a band-aid in reality) this was VERY painful, I now have no hair in the area the bag was stuck to me.

ouch.

Moral of the story is that I am glad I stepped into someone else's shoes so I could get out of my own head and realize that I need to quit complaining. I have a disease that could be invisible if I wanted it to and not everyone is that lucky.

Famous Diabetic Fridays.

Today's famous diabetic is Jay Cutler of the Chicago bears. He answered 10 questions about life with type 1 diabetes in Diabetes Forecast. Here is his interview....

He is a cutie in this picture

Jay Cutler of the Chicago Bears is not only a gunslinging Pro Bowl quarterback; he's also probably the highest-profile athlete today with diabetes. A lot has happened since Cutler's October 2008 interview in Diabetes Forecast: He left the Denver Broncos and signed with the Bears; won a $30 million contract extension through the 2013 season; joined with Eli Lilly & Co. to send kids to American Diabetes Association Diabetes Camps; and has educated football fans about diabetes while being a role model for kids with the disease.

Cutler gave Forecast a mid-season update:

How has playing football been different since you were diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in 2008?

Well, I had to learn a whole new routine—taking insulin shots, checking and regulating my blood sugar, just getting used to being a person with diabetes. The first couple months were tough. But I did have a good season after I was diagnosed. A lot of that has to do with my teammates and good coaching, but some of it—I just wanted to prove people wrong. Now it's just becoming part of who I am.

How do you manage your blood glucose on game days?

I check my blood sugar about four or five times before the game—try to stay around 150 to 160 [mg/dl] before kickoff. Most of the time, I prick my finger every time we come off the field, especially in the first half. There are definitely dangers out there—we try to avoid them at all costs. That's why we check as many times as we do. I think the worst thing imaginable would be to get really low and pass out in the middle of a play, or in the huddle. That would scare a lot of people. I try to avoid it as much as possible, but it's still a reality that could happen.

How have your new teammates and coaches on the Bears reacted to your diabetes?

Everybody's been great. The Bears' medical and training staff has helped keep my diabetes management seamless, and the whole organization is committed to diabetes causes thanks to the work Coach [Lovie] Smith does with the [American Diabetes Association]. But hopefully no one on the team thinks about the fact that I have diabetes. On the field, I'm just the quarterback.

How satisfied are you with the Bears' performance this season thus far?

We've had some good games but still have some things to work on as an offense. We're all working to make the playoffs, so hopefully we'll get there.

If you have an off day, do teammates, the media, or fans look to your diabetes as a reason?

I hope not. I don't want sympathy—I want to be judged like every other quarterback. But living with diabetes in the public eye does make it harder. If I go out and my numbers are off and I have a bad game, I know I'll be criticized for it. I just try not to worry about it and go out and play my game.

How did the stress of the big change you recently made—leaving Denver to play for Chicago—affect your health?

No problems. You're always going to have stress; you just deal with it and watch your blood sugar, manage as you have to.

What is the media spotlight like now that you are in a bigger city?

When you're an NFL quarterback, you're going to be in the spotlight no matter where you are. But the Bears are one of the highest-profile teams in the league, so there's a lot of attention generated by the nature of the job. I'm really enjoying my time in Chicago and glad to be a part of the organization for years to come.

You have also taken on the role of diabetes advocate, helping send kids to diabetes camp with the Touchdowns for Diabetes program and visiting children's hospitals.

Visiting children's hospitals in the off-season with [Eli Lilly & Co.] was a great way to connect with kids and families who are dealing with this disease. I've been fortunate to meet some incredible kids along the way.

The first visit, we met some kids in Tampa who had been diagnosed at 3 and 4 years old. I just can't even imagine what that's like for the kids and the parents at that age. A couple months later we visited La Rabida Children's Hospital in Chicago. A kid came up and gave me a letter. I get a lot of letters from kids and parents, but this one was different. He had been diagnosed about three years before I was, and he wrote me a letter to let me know everything was going to be OK. That really touched me. I've gotten to know him a little, and he and his parents came to training camp this summer and I got to see him after practice for a few minutes. Those are the kind of experiences I really like—when it's just two people with diabetes connecting.

With Touchdowns for Diabetes, I love the fact that we're working with Lilly and ADA to help get more kids to camp. We know camp is so important for kids to connect with other kids with diabetes, so I'm glad we can work together to give families a little help.

What are your plans for continuing to use your celebrity as a platform to raise awareness about diabetes?

I'm looking forward to meeting more kids and families affected by diabetes as we tour the country with Lilly in the off-season. And we're planning to do more with diabetes through my foundation. Stay tuned.

What do you hope that kids with diabetes—including young athletes—will learn from your story?

I want to play as well as I can on the field, but I really want to use my story to reach as many people as I possibly can with this disease—especially kids. Before diabetes, I wanted to win a Super Bowl, have a long career. I still want to win. But I also want to help make people more aware of the issues faced by people with diabetes. I don't want to just be a face. I want to be hands-on and make a difference. I think I got this for a reason. I know I have the opportunity to help change lives. I definitely want to continue to have an impact and inspire kids with the message that diabetes doesn't have to stand in the way of achieving their own goals in life.

I don't really know much about Jay Cutler and I don't really follow football, but this interview really touched my heart. He seems to really care about  getting awareness out there and that is inspiring. He really wants to help people and as much as this disease sucks, I am glad to have him on my team (team diabetes that is). man... that was lame.

This is the website I got the interview from! Enjoy!!

http://forecast.diabetes.org/magazine/kids-families/bears-quarterback-jay-cutler-answers-10-questions?page=0%2C1

Time to work out????

So here I am ready for day 2 of the 30 day shred and I check my blood sugar (like a responsible diabetic) and see 85 mg/dl flash back at me! Great right? Yes on a normal day, but when you add Jillian Michaels into the mix it would be 45 mg/dl within 5 minutes  So I guess I am going to eat some glucose tablets and wait a second because I actually want to finish the workout and not end up with my face on the ground. Isn't diabetes awesome??

I hate her.

But I think I am going to love her in the end.

Day 1 complete and I feel like my legs are going to fall off. I really hope to keep this up for the 30 days but I am afraid she might kill me. I have tried this once before and got about 12 days in and then gave up (I am awesome) but this time I really need to try. Not only for my health, but because bikini season is only like a month away. Lets get healthy (or die trying).

I think people should know......

Don't be afraid to tell your friends you are a diabetic, Use it as an opportunity to get closer to them. 

-Nick Jonas I have decided to share some things about my life as a diabetic that I think everyone needs to know. There are a lot of misconceptions about diabetes and this one blog wont change that but I think people should know......

Shots hurt.

The pump does not check my blood sugar or let know know what my blood sugar is doing.

I check my sugars like 8 times a day.

Diabetes is a full time job with no pay check.

I can actually eat whatever I want.

Insulin is a beautiful thing.

EVERYTHING affects blood sugar.

I cry a lot.

Diabetes cannot run my life, but it does change it.

I am always thirsty.

This sucks....

Too much insulin can kill me.

Glucagon can save my life.

Not enough insulin can kill me.

I DID NOT do this to myself.

Diabetes is forever.

Just because I have it doesn't mean I know everything about diabetes.

I go to the doctor every 3 months.

I have a great support system.

A roller coaster will kill my pump.

I decided to become a nurse after I was diagnosed with diabetes.

My blood sugar can keep my up all night.

No one can understand low blood sugar unless you have had it.

I can tell how low my sugar is based in the symptoms without checking (but i still do).

I trust my husband with my life every time i go to sleep (because I might now wake up).

I sleep with my pump under a pillow so I don't get wrapped in the cord.

I change my pump site every 3 days (or sooner).

If I don't have health insurance I cannot afford any supplies.

Pregnancy is not something that can "just happen" it MUST be planned.

I have many scars.

I am high risk for everything.

Sugar free is not always better.

Yes, I wear my pump all the time.. No, it's not because I want to.

A pump malfunction is terrifying.

Pump companies have the absolute best customer service and most of them are diabetic!

This is just a glimpse into the life of a type 1 diabetic. I have so much going on in my head all the time it gives me a head ache. There is never a time I can let me guard down with this disease because it is a constant struggle. Everything effects my sugars and that is something I am still getting used to. No this disease does not get any easier but I am learning how to manage it.

Medicine Cabinet.

This is my medicine cabinet.....

(Got all the containers/lazy susan at Walmart, the basket at the top is from the dollar store. This helps me keep things separated and prganized)

Probably looks similar to yours minus all the diabetic supplies (well that is unless you or someone in your family is diabetic). For most people a medicine cabinet is something you go into every once in a while to get a band-aid or some ibuprofen.. For me this is a place I go just about every day for glucose tablets (which are  in about every room of my house), batteries for my pump/blood sugar monitor, pump supplies and testing strips, along with the band-aids and ibuprofen. If I need insulin I go to the fridge....

yes.. I keep my insulin in the butter section of the fridge!

I spent a good amount of time organizing the medicine cabinet just to have to re-do it every time I get a new shipment of pump supplies or prescriptions.

The reason I took the time to introduce you to my medicine cabinet/insulin storage is because a lot of people don't realize how many supplies are involved to manage this disease. Most people only see the insulin and blood sugar monitor, but there is a lot of other equipment involved with diabetes. It is something I constantly have to think about, when I go out of town.. I have an extra bag full of diabetic supplies. This is just another part of my life that you have been introduced to, your welcome. :)

Man.. I need to think of something more interesting to write about haha.